Photograph
by darkwoodsdreamer
Summary: There's a hole in Ginny's soul. Perhaps Colin can restore the missing piece. Written for wouldtheywriteasongforyou.


p style="text-align: center;"emWell, I've never been one to sing about my troubles/em/p  
p style="text-align: center;"emI figure most of the world has enough of their own/em/p  
p style="text-align: center;"emBut now and then I think that when we sing about our truth /em/p  
p style="text-align: center;"emMaybe we light up a pathway for somebody else/em/p  
p style="text-align: center;"em-Sad, Brother Sun/em/p  
hr /  
p style="text-align: left;"Ginny spent a lot of time staring into the fireplace afterwards. She watched the flames dance and jump, casting their beauty around the room and warming the hearts and bodies of all those who get close. She wished that she could be like those flames, that maybe for once in her life she wouldn't feel so emgoddamned useless/em. Instead, she was the sort of fire that destroyed everything in its path. /p  
p style="text-align: left;"She couldn't cast the idea out of her head that everything that had happened this year was all her fault. She opened hear heart to the diary, to Tom, and he crushed it. He never cared about her or her life. Had she been a little smarter, a little stronger, she could have stopped him before he hurt anyone. emBefore I hurt anyone, /emshe reminds herself, and the hollow in her chest grows a little bigger. After Harry pulled her out of the Chamber, Madame Pomfrey and Dumbledore and all the others told her she wasn't to blame. She didn't have any control over her body, she was being possessed, that nothing was her fault. What they didn't understand was that she had made the room for Tom to take over her flesh in the first place. Everything came back to her. /p  
p style="text-align: left;"A body plopped down in the chair next to hers with a sigh. Ginny glanced at the person out of the corner of her eyes quickly. Colin Creevy rubbed his hands together and leaned forward in his chair towards the warmth of the flames. Ginny in turn curled herself into a tighter ball, trying to send out a, "Whatever you do, don't talk to me" sort of vibe. /p  
p style="text-align: left;"It didn't work. Then again, Colin had never been one to understand subtle social cues. "Hey, Ginny." he said with a tinge less cheer than usual. /p  
p style="text-align: left;""Hi Colin." She didn't look at him, still hoping he would get the idea. She liked the guy, really. She didn't want to be rude and tell him to shove off, but truth be told she didn't have much faith that he would figure it out himself./p  
p style="text-align: left;"Colin sat back and pulled his legs up underneath him. "How're you?" /p  
p style="text-align: left;""Alright." /p  
p style="text-align: left;""No, you're not." Ginny blinked and finally made eye contact. Colin stared back, apparently not aware he'd said anything off. Ginny wrinkled her nose and set her head back down on her knees, resuming her fire-watching. /p  
p style="text-align: left;""If you already knew the answer, why did you ask?" She grumbled. /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Colin watched her for a long moment. "Because," he said slowly. "You're my friend. If you're sad, I want to know why so I can help you." /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Ginny almost laughed. She could count the amount of conversations she'd had with him on her fingers, yet he considered them such close friends? "No offense Colin, but I don't want to talk about it with you." /p  
p style="text-align: left;"He didn't seem offended in the slightest. "Okay." he said with a shrug. He settled into the chair and stared into the flames. The fire was running out of wood now, and Ginny knew she should get up and put some more on, but she didn't much feel like it. Maybe if she let the fire die, the fear and sadness and hate in her heart would die with it. /p  
p style="text-align: left;"No such luck. Colin stood and threw a few small pieces of wood into the grate. "They should put everlasting charms on the fire." He commented as he wiped his hands on his pants. Ginny shook her head. /p  
p style="text-align: left;""If they did that, some git might put more wood on it. It could grow out of control and they wouldn't be able to stop it." Colin looked at her for a moment, something undefinable in his face for a moment. Then he laughed and nodded. /p  
p style="text-align: left;""Yeah, you're right. I bet it would be me." Just the slightest hint of bitterness infected his voice. In someone else, Ginny wouldn't have even noticed it. It sounded wrong in Colin's voice, though. He was usually so full of joy and laughter that it almost seemed as though he'd never experienced pain of any sort. /p  
p style="text-align: left;"She really shouldn't ask. Opening up her mouth now would mean starting a conversation about feelings and there was a good chance it would turn back to her. /p  
p style="text-align: left;""I'm pretty good at screwing things up." The same usual smile was plastered on his face, but it was different somehow now. Like it took effort./p  
p style="text-align: left;"Ginny sighed and shifted slightly so that her body was facing him. "What do you mean?" /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Colin didn't say anything for a moment. He curled his feet back underneath him as he sat and folded his hands into lap. "I don't have many friends." he said after a while. /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Ginny blinked. "What do you mean? Everyone likes you." Colin shook his head. /p  
p style="text-align: left;""No, everyone tolerates me." he clarified. "Really, they think I'm annoying. That's why no one ever likes to talk to me and avoids me." /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Ginny didn't have anything to say to that. Wasn't that what she had just been doing moments ago? She hadn't imagined that he was observant enough to figure out what she had been doing. /p  
p style="text-align: left;""They all think I'm stupid, too." /p  
p style="text-align: left;""Who thinks that?" /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Colin made a vague, all-encompassing hand gesture. "Everyone does." he said. "They don't realize that I see everything, though. I know what they think about me. You have to be able to see that sort of stuff if you're gonna be a photographer." /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Ginny felt a little heat rise to her cheeks. How many times had she thought those sorts of things about him, that he was aggravating or perhaps a couple branches short of a tree? How many times had he read those thoughts plain as day on her face? Yet, he still called her a friend. "How are you so nice to everyone?" she asked. /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Colin blinked at her, confused. "What do you mean?" he asked. /p  
p style="text-align: left;""You treat everyone like they're your best friend even though you think they hate you." She said. "I couldn't do it." /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Colin laughed. "That's 'cause you've got a red-head's temper." he said. "Don't worry, I like it. You're better at standing up for yourself than I am." /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Ginny frowned. "I'm good at causing trouble, you mean. If I hadn't been so stupid-" Immediately, she shut her mouth and looked away. How had he done that? How had he made her want to open up about Harry and the chamber and the diary? She wouldn't do it, though. Some things were better not discussed, and she still couldn't shake the idea that he was too innocent to dump this on. /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Colin shook his head. "That's not causing trouble. That's making a mistake." He looked away from her. "Me, though... I see that people don't like me. I know that I'm getting on their nerves, and I just keep doing it anyways and then get upset when people still don't like me. I just don't learn." /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Ginny laughed suddenly. Colin looked back up, surprised. "What is it? What's so funny?" /p  
p style="text-align: left;""Us!" Ginny giggled. "We're, like, comparing bad traits. 'No, I'm worse and here's why,'." Colin smiled slowly. /p  
p style="text-align: left;""You're right, we're being ridiculous." he said with a little laugh. He turned so that he faced her better and leaned forward. "Let's take it one at a time, then. Tell me why you're upset, and I'll tell you why I am." /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Ginny shrugged. "It's just..." she sighed. "I've done some awful things this year. Everyone says that it's not my fault because I didn't know what was going on, but that's a load of BS. I was still the one doing them, y'know? Even if I didn't know that I was doing it. I could have stopped it if I was a little smarter." She stared down dejectedly, trying not to cry. It was the first time she'd let herself say any of it allowed, and it was to Colin Creevy of all people. How had the kid opened her up like that? What had he done to make her trust him? /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Colin thought about that for a moment. "Sometimes," he said after a moment, "if you really don't know the consequence of your actions, you can't be blamed for them." Ginny squinted at him. /p  
p style="text-align: left;""But that's just it." she told him. "I should have known. I should have been able to guess what would have happened. I was raised around magic, but I couldn't figure out how to avoid one little magical problem?" she shook her head and rested her forehead against her knees. "God, I'm such an idiot!" /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Colin shook his head again. "There's no point beating yourself up over not knowing something." he said with a shrug. "Now you know. Now you can avoid it in the future if you learn the lesson." Ginny took a deep breath and repeated those words to herself. The hollowed out area of her soul wasn't quite convinced, but maybe Colin really was right. Maybe she really wasn't at fault, or at least not as much fault as she'd thought before. /p  
p style="text-align: left;""Yeah. Maybe." She said aloud. "What about you? What's got you down?" Half of her just wanted to get the topic off of her, but the other half did genuinely care what he was upset about. You couldn't help but let it get to you when someone like him was feeling blue. Their negative energy was just as infectious as their positive. /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Colin didn't answer for a minute. "It's all stupid." He said after a minute. "I'm scared that no one likes me. The whole reason I was excited to come here was because I thought I would be around other kids like me. I thought everyone would accept me for who I was. It's not like that though." He gestured around at the empty common room. "Even in my own house, people hate me and push me away. I just..." he shook his head. "I guess I'm just a little disappointed." /p  
p style="text-align: left;"That twinge of guilt hit her again. She chewed on her lip, thinking. "Maybe," she said slowly, "maybe if you show people what you can do? Like with your camera." she pointed to the camera case, which was sitting on the floor next to his chair. Colin looked at it, then at her in confusion. /p  
p style="text-align: left;""My pictures?" he asked, tone skeptical. /p  
p style="text-align: left;""Yeah. You'll get respect from people when they see what a great photographer you are, and then when they get to know you, they'll see you're not annoying or stupid or whatever it is they say." Colin still didn't seem convinced. Ginny leaned forward, the plan forming in her mind. "Offer to take people's pictures. Get photos of the Quidditch teams and candids of people in the hall and of people posing with their friends. Anything you can. You could make a business out of selling people their pictures. People would commission you." A grin was plastered on her face by the time she was done. How was it that she could come up with these sorts of things for other people, but never herself? /p  
p style="text-align: left;"It took a moment for the idea to catch in Colin's head, but eventually the same grin was on his face as well. "That's brilliant." he said in a hushed voice. "It really is. You're brilliant!" He pulled out his camera and turned it over in his hands. "The Quidditch teams especially would love the pictures of them practicing or scoring goals in games." Ginny nodded encouragingly. /p  
p style="text-align: left;"Colin turned towards her, excitement practically seeping out of his every pore. "Can I take your picture?" Ginny hesitated. She didn't especially like having her picture taken and she didn't have any spare money. "You don't need to pay me." he added hurriedly. "I just want to get in practice taking good pictures of people. You're a perfect subject!"/p  
p style="text-align: left;"Well, she couldn't argue when he put it like that. This had been her suggestion, after all. She pushed her hair behind her ears. "Well, alright then. I guess it can't hurt."/p  
p style="text-align: left;"Colin's smile was ear to ear, and Ginny felt a warm tingle in her stomach. It was worth letting him take her picture again and again if it was going to make him this happy. He jumped up and gently took her hand, standing her up and positioning her in front of the fireplace. After the first few photos, Ginny started to warm up to the whole thing. It was actually kind of fun, letting Colin tell her how to move or which way to face and then looking at the pictures together. Some of them were downright awful, but many more great. She was simply floored by his ability to take her, one of the most un-photogenic people she had ever met, and make her look beautiful. /p  
p style="text-align: left;"They continued well into the night, and it wasn't until both of them could hardly keep their eyes open that they said goodnight and trudged up to their dorms. Ginny climbed into her bed fully clothed, not having the energy to change into pajamas. As her eyes fluttered closed and she drifted off, she thought she very much would like to do that again. /p  
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p style="text-align: left;"strongAN: This was written (very late; sorry about that) for wouldtheywriteasongforyou. Congratulations on winning the It's Not Your Story competition! I hope you like this piece!/strong/p  
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